Will This Matter in 5 Years? Linking Emotional Intelligence to Your Future

Will This Matter in 5 Years?

Most of us have heard it - the remedy for when we are upset:  Will this really matter in 5 years?



I suppose it is a good question, but I don't really like it.  Here's why:  It is not emotionally intelligent.



Emotional Intelligence is about identifying and managing

emotion. If all you do is dismiss your present reality as something that doesn't matter, then you don't deal with WHY you are being upset. The reality is that if you are upset, something is off-balance.  The presenting issue may be insignificant for your future, but the reason is significant for your present and your future.

Rather than dismissing your emotion, ask these easy questions:

1. What about this is really upsetting me?  Try to use actual feeling words like these:

• Am I feeling disrespected
• Am I feeling insecure
• Am I feeling unloved
• Am I feeling powerless
• Am I feeling stupid
• Am I feeling dismissed

 2.  How am I managing this emotion?

• What is the drama I am believing about this situation?
• What is the truth about this situation?
• How much of this is my "stuff" and how much is someone else's?
• What can I do about my stuff because I can't do anything about theirs?

Listen to my video blog about an actual incident where I used these questions.


Here's the summary:

Your emotion today does matter in 5 years

If you are UPSET, then it means that your present reality is unbalanced.  This means you have an opportunity to RESET your future.  You can reset your future by asking a few questions about your emotions.  This is how your emotions matter 5 years from now.